Swim Nazi, Day One

I have a lot that I want to blog about right now: 1. We had an AWESOME and even better, RELAXING vacation WITH OUR KIDDOES!!! at Hyatt Lost Pines last week. It was only 30 minutes from home and such a nice break. 2. Noah turned 2!!! last week and he is doing so many fun things. I will definitely write about Noah, but right now, I'm pooped and the laundry is piling up, so I'm going to write about 3. John Michael's swim lessons with the Swim Nazi that started today.

Oh, you don't know the Swim Nazi? There is a lady in Austin known as the Swim Nazi, Gwen Hurst. JM's cousin Madeleine took lessons from her last summer and within a week went from scaredy cat to swimming bravely underwater across the pool. My mom couldn't believe her progress and has been talking about it ever since. Then, the other week we went to a swim playdate at a classmate of JM's house, and everyone who had lessons from the Swim Nazi was swimming... everyone who didn't was floating around in floaties or on the side. After the playdate, I asked Madeleine's mom for the Swim Nazi information and by luck, somehow Aunt Kim had two spots reserved for this week's session and gave one to me.

Anyway, the Swim Nazi pretty much teaches by forcing the kids to swim in four short lessons that are 10-15 minutes long. It is painful to watch. Today, we went to an elegant home in Westlake and I watched her take JM's head and push it underwater and shove him in a glide towards the wall multiple times in our 10 minute session. It was horrible. He cried a lot. I wanted to cry and would have if I had not been distracted by having to nurse Aaron and simultaneously keep the homeowners' pet pig!!! from drooling on my carseat and nibbling at my purse. Yes, that's right I said pet pig. He was grazing in the lawn when we got there, took a dip in the pool during another kid's lesson and even had a doggie door to the house.

Why am I doing this torture to my precious child? 1. My biggest fear as a parent is one of my kids drowning in a pool. 2. JM is a weenie and as a former swim teacher and coach I don't see a lot of natural desire in him to want to swim on his own. We took lessons at the J last summer and I feel like they were kind of a waste of money, as he returned immediately from lessons to put his floaties back on. 3. I've heard that most kids who've gone to Gwen love her at the end of the week and are also swimming confidently on their own by then.

I'm supposed to wear my swimsuit Thursday and he will swim to me. Really?!!! I'm somewhat skeptical. Tomorrow we have Day 2, which is supposedly the hardest day. JM went from crying hysterically this afternoon, to us getting ice cream to saying he never wanted to go back to swim lessons to saying he wanted to take his goggles tomorrow. We'll see.